How do you deal with adversity?

How do you deal with Adversity?

Occasionally I pop along to help out at the Back to Business Club – a great initiative set up to respond to a rise in professional and management redundancies in the Peterborough area. Many of the people there are experiencing difficult times – the Industry they were in has declined or perhaps they are just a couple of years short of retirement. They are all dealing with adversity.

Many of us throughout our lives deal with some kind of adversity: divorce, redundancy, loss of loved ones, accidents, credit crunch etc

It reminds me of a story I’ve read that demonstrates brilliantly how people deal with adversity –  “The Carrot, Egg and Coffee Bean”

The story is about a girl that is having lots of problems – she’s feeling really sorry for herself so she goes to see her Mum, who’s cooking in the kitchen. Her Mum gets 3 pans of boiling water – in one she chops up a large carrot, in another she carefully places an egg and in the 3^rd she throws in some ground coffee beans.

She sits with her daughter and waits – not saying a word – then stands up and turns off the hob. She drains the carrots, fishes out the egg and puts them in a bowl; she then pours out the coffee into 2 mugs.

The Mum then tells the daughter to feel the carrot – and asks what’s different now it’s been cooked – “It’s soft” says the daughter. “And what about the egg?” says the Mum. “It’s hard” she replies. Finally the Mum asks her to sip the coffee and she smiles as she smells and tastes the rich aroma.

“Mum, get to the point” the daughter laughs.

The Mum explains that each of the objects faced the same adversity – the boiling water – but they all reacted differently. The carrot went in hard and strong and ended up soft and weak. The egg was fragile with the delicate shell protecting the runny goo – however now being subjected to the boiling water over time – has hardened. The ground coffee beans were unique however. Once being in the boiling water – they changed the water.

 “Which are you?” she asked her daughter.

“When you face adversity – how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?”

Are you the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity, do you wilt and lose your strength? Do you become depressed and fragile?

Are you the egg that starts with a soft heart, but changes with the heat? Do you become hard and stiff after dealing with some hardship? Does your shell look the same but inside you are bitter?

Or are you like the coffee bean? You change the situation around you, take control and improve the flavour!

How do you handle adversity? How do you handle difficulties? Does it get the better of you or do you get the better of the situation?
So, which are you…a carrot, an egg, or a coffee bean?