I always thought that deep spiritual moments happened in a beautiful place such as on top of a mountain with the world unfolding below….not sitting in our little blue car whilst Tim’s driving down the A14.
I am sobbing my heart out, the tears are streaming down my face and it feels as if a vice is squeezing my chest. Tim looks over concerned. Thoughts are whirling around in my head, I can see his concern and I want to reassure him.
I am feeling totally overwhelmed…with gratitude. Here I am, an ordinary lady, and I recognise, with extraordinary gifts. Through my tears, I manage to look out the window screen and it’s as if nature is reflecting my gift. The clouds overhead are dark and thunderous. And straight ahead is a ray of sunshine streaming through. No matter what the weather, the sun is always there, bright, happy and light. Life has its ups and downs, yin and yang, giving and receiving – one has to exist with the other. And my gift? I connect with people, they open up and then the magic happens. I enable people to discover and build their own resources, resilience and self-trust. They realise that they have choices; they can choose how they think, feel, behave, so that, whatever happens in life, they have their own ray of sunshine within them. And I am grateful as I am able to use my gifts every day.
I look back at Tim, this sets me off again, sobbing. Tim is such a special person, I am so lucky. He is always full of love. For years I searched for happiness and feeling contented – and Tim is the epitome of this – an exemplar at the most highest. I am so grateful and honoured being his wife and friend.
And then I think about our two boys. The vice squeezes tighter – the feeling of gratefulness and love overwhelms me again. I am grateful for our two beautiful sons, both inside and out. My sisters – who are both full of kindness and love. My friends. My parents. My Mum gives me the drive and passion to do what I do, my Dad has passed on his legacy of humour and organising – a Greenaway trait.
And then my thoughts turn to Sue Knight who has chosen me as her Apprentice. The sobs are louder with a mix of laughter. Wow! How lucky am I. Each day I am learning. Sue pokes me, shares with me, teaches me, holds up the mirror, encourages me and trusts me. I used to put Sue on a pedestal – it felt incongruent, uncomfortable. And now, in her words, “friendship and the influence we mutually have”.
All these thoughts are whizzing round like a liquidizer and at last, the lid flies off and my words spew out. Tim breathes out with relief – we laugh, I cry – what a mixture!
I share with Tim how I am struggling to put to words my passion, it sounds so nebulous. He asks what fires me up. This question reminds me of sitting with Sue and Colin in Raintree Hotel, Chennai and hearing “You are the Anti-Depressant!” I realise that this is rather negative and away from – how can I flip it? Mental strength, sustainable resilience, confidence, inner trust? These words spring up.
The sun is shining brightly both inside and out. I have a vision of a golden network growing and spreading across the world that lights up….a movement. One person can affect only so many people. And a whole network – now this is exciting. The fog of my vision starts to clear. I see that I am connecting with people in the medical and personal development arena and leaders who all are passionate in enabling people to build resilience, confidence and inner trust in their lives.
Together we are making waves – running programmes for people that want to develop their emotional well-being, building resilience and having alternatives to pill popping.
Here I am – standing in a large bright room with 30 people. I am glowing with excited energy knowing that each person has chosen to be in this room and attracted to work with me. Through my knowledge, insights and deep passion I am facilitating, I see the learnings flow all around the room, each person is learning how to develop their own and other’s emotional well-being, shifts are happening. I hear a buzz of excitement around me; my golden thread connects with each person in the room at a deep level. I am fulfilling my purpose and am on a mission building our golden network. I am joyful and so, so very grateful.
I turn to Tim and squeeze his hand. The journey has begun.
Lindsey Reed is an experienced NLP coach and trainer – getting the brilliant you to shine through.
Email Lindsey@glows-coaching.co.uk or call 01832 280168 to see how you can improve your personal and working life. Alternatively you may be interested in booking onto the next Confidence Workshop or work through the “How to be Confident” Home Study Programme so that you discover the Confidence within yourself.