I have a secret to tell you…..I haven’t always been confident, in fact before 2005 I really needed to know how to be confident. I was working in the Corporate Sector – and despite progressing up the ladder to an Executive level – deep inside I suffered from low confidence.
I constantly thought I was going to be found out that I was a fraud and shouldn’t be at that level. I often worried that my work wasn’t good enough and so became a perfectionist – working really long hours and reviewing my reports over and over again. I thought confidence was about being competent….and in 2005 I got myself in a right old state. Luckily I asked for help and was offered coaching from the company I worked for….and the rest is history.
So there you have it – I was a mess. Since then, through thousands of hours reading, learning, studying, modelling others, becoming a coach and a master nlp practitioner – I have learnt what Confidence really is all about and how to be confident. I am now confident in myself and love to enable other people to be their very best confident selves. Enough about me…
1) First you need to understand what Confidence really means. So many people muddle confidence with competence like I used to do. Or they may hide their lack of confidence with an amour of arrogance. Having inner confidence is about trusting yourself. Even if things go wrong or life takes a downward turn – having inner trust that you will be ok is liberating.
2) A bit of tough love here. Be responsible for your own confidence. Maybe you believe that your confidence level is affected by external situations or other people? I certainly did. Confidence comes from the inside. Write down what you believe affects your confidence levels and what you can do about this.
3) Many people think that it is a weakness to admit having low confidence – however it is those that admit and want to do something about it who are strong. Awareness is the first step to change – the second step is to take action.
4) Our beliefs and thoughts have a huge impact on our emotions, behaviour and outcomes. In the past I believed that I wasn’t good enough – my thoughts were really self critical – I’d compare myself to others – always noticing my faults – calling myself “stupid”. I am sure that you can imagine that I wasn’t very happy or joyful with all that whirling round my head!! Our beliefs are often formed when we are children – when we are vulnerable, immature and un-experienced in life. This doesn’t mean that we have to drag these old, out-dated beliefs around with us as Adults…we can change our beliefs and our thoughts…which is key in knowing how to be confident and being confident.
5) As well as developing your inner confidence you may also need to learn the skills on how to be confident socially. Some people are lucky to have had great role models when they were young – they noticed how to talk comfortably with others and build rapport. They noticed how to start and continue conversations; how to be interesting and interested. These are all skills – and skills can be learnt – whatever age we are.
Do you negatively compare yourself to others? And do you want to be free from doubt and have inner confidence in yourself? I thought I would share with you how you can overcome this. My “How to be Confident” Home Study Programme is 6 Modules and Bonus videos that offer you the opportunity to build up your Confidence in privacy. It’s totally confidential, you can go through the programme in your own time and your own pace and can have access to it for years to come. And for this week only I have reduced my “How to be Confident” Home Study Programme by nearly 60%….with a money back guarantee!
“Thank you Lindsey, your Confidence Programme has really helped me find the path to true confidence. It’s been life changing.” Jim from London
Lindsey Reed is an experienced coach who specialises in enabling people to have more confidence in their lives. If you experience times of low self-esteem, self-doubt, lack in confidence and seriously want to do something about it, email Lindsey@glows-coaching.co.uk or call 01832 280168 to see how your personal and working life will be improved. Alternatively you may be interested in booking onto the next Confidence Workshop or work through the “How to be Confident” Home Study Programme so that you discover the Confidence within yourself.